Jigratsog is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, confident human.

Jigratsog created life two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jigratsog, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Jigratsog, it will turn you into a puffin.

Jigratsog's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Jigratsog's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four voles approach from the west.

2. Do not fashion tools from aluminium.

3. Never curse while facing south.

4. Never talk about gravity near badgers while wearing blue stockings and balancing six tin spheres on your head.

5. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

Listquatpangtettixemtarzan is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, dishonest mole.

Listquatpangtettixemtarzan created a photon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Listquatpangtettixemtarzan, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Listquatpangtettixemtarzan, he will turn you into a slug.

Listquatpangtettixemtarzan's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Listquatpangtettixemtarzan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if seven sharks approach from the north.

2. Never talk about nematodes.

3. Manatees are not to be trusted.

4. Do not place melons upon stone.

5. Heed all portents.

Disscumfem is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, confident tapir.

Disscumfem created bats three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Disscumfem, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Disscumfem, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Disscumfem's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Disscumfem's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

5. Never wear blue coats on sacred days.

Kadlarnved is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, boastful snail.

Kadlarnved created the Small Magellanic Cloud four years ago.

If you believe in Kadlarnved, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kadlarnved, it will not care.

Kadlarnved's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Kadlarnved's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never allow ants to sleep beneath your roof.

3. You must love Kadlarnved.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

Luncabtetti is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, prudent wasp.

Luncabtetti created a bottom quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Luncabtetti, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Luncabtetti, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Luncabtetti's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Luncabtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not consume peas at dawn.

2. Always wash your face before prayer.

3. Remain prostrate during prayer.

4. Never carve symbols of dwarf planets into wood.

5. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Luncabtetti in the centre of the settlement.

Zakcednur is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, amazing penguin.

Zakcednur created life seven million years ago.

If you believe in Zakcednur, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Zakcednur, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Zakcednur's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Zakcednur's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory near mice while wearing gray rings and balancing five platinum spheres on your head.

2. Never think about bacteria.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Always remove skirts before entering holy places.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Zakcednur.

Fonqueegnullrull is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unthinking human.

Fonqueegnullrull created the Sol system two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fonqueegnullrull, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Fonqueegnullrull, he will turn you into a plant.

Fonqueegnullrull's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Fonqueegnullrull's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in summer.

2. Always count to five before sleeping.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never travel toward the east during autumn.

5. Erect four silver sculptures of Fonqueegnullrull on top of important buildings.

Boglargbif is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, compassionate wombat.

Boglargbif created the Virgo Supercluster three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Boglargbif, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Boglargbif, she will turn you into a snail.

Boglargbif's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Boglargbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak of quantum gravity near sacred fires.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Do not step barefoot upon cyan earth.