Nurlnakfid is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, conceited spider.

Nurlnakfid created the universe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlnakfid, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nurlnakfid, he will not care.

Nurlnakfid's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Nurlnakfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never travel toward the south during winter.

4. Hide if four bats approach from the west.

5. Never paint your chest yellow.