Gandabstik is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, resourceful butterfly.

Gandabstik created water four years ago.

If you believe in Gandabstik, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gandabstik, she will turn you into a puffin.

Gandabstik's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Gandabstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle platinum while unclean.

2. Always help sick ants.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gandabstik.

4. Hide from magenta nematodes for they are unholy.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.