Viljabquag is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, irritating swan.

Viljabquag created dark matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Viljabquag, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Viljabquag, she will turn you into a hamster.

Viljabquag's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Viljabquag's Holy Commandments

1. Never stain your head with turquoise.

2. Do not name children after shrews.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not study amino acids on holy days.

5. Never jump in holy places.