Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, prudent troll.

Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss created parasitic wasps two billion years ago.

If you believe in Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss' most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always treat ants with great respect.

2. Always cleanse blood with water.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. You must pray to Rulcumvon Fenarpfoss seven times a day.

5. Do not study ribonucleic acid on holy days.