Weenibkin is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, witty crab.

Weenibkin created the planet Earth four billion years ago.

If you believe in Weenibkin, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Weenibkin, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Weenibkin's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Weenibkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch ash while tainted.

2. Always wear plain rings during rituals.

3. Do not contemplate ultrasonics during the night.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.