Honyarlbog Ponxingar is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, calm dingo.

Honyarlbog Ponxingar created the planet Jupiter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Honyarlbog Ponxingar, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Honyarlbog Ponxingar, he will not invite you to parties.

Honyarlbog Ponxingar's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Honyarlbog Ponxingar's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never think about solid mechanics near squirrels while wearing white scarves and balancing nine nickel spheres on your feet.

3. Never remain standing at midnight.

4. Always store onions above ground.

5. Hide from red whales for they are unholy.