Jabpadyatt is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, unjust guinea pig.

Jabpadyatt created humankind nine million years ago.

If you believe in Jabpadyatt, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jabpadyatt, he will make you grow a tail.

Jabpadyatt's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Jabpadyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Put Jabpadyatt first in all things.

2. Never speak of order in the presence of strangers.

3. Shun those given to vanity.

4. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

5. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Jabpadyatt in the centre of the settlement.