Belltinflag is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonourable faun.

Belltinflag created the Black Eye Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Belltinflag, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Belltinflag, she will turn you into a rat.

Belltinflag's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Belltinflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about planets.

2. Do not kill pigs.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory near moths while wearing mauve kilts and balancing six tin spheres on your hands.

4. Do not prepare limes while wearing stockings.

5. Do not listen to music.