Flan is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, witless butterfly.

Flan created a charm quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flan, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Flan, she will ignore you.

Flan's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Flan's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Flan.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force near foxes while wearing orange shirts and balancing six lead spheres on your feet.

3. Never feed strawberries to moths while wearing black scarves.

4. Never look at moons.

5. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.