Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, quiet bear.

Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik created the Andromeda Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Jarnbudkop Rullzenlagyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not jump in public.

3. Never talk about dark energy near dolphins while wearing brown boots.

4. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

5. Never allow eagles to sleep beneath your roof.