Fembafjat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, annoying skunk.

Fembafjat created light nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fembafjat, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fembafjat, he will cry a lot.

Fembafjat's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Fembafjat's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always obey Fembafjat's priests.

3. Never feed garlic to porpoises while wearing jumpers.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Do not listen to music.