Fossgigxin Larntimsaw is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, selfish jellyfish.

Fossgigxin Larntimsaw created an up quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fossgigxin Larntimsaw, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fossgigxin Larntimsaw, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Fossgigxin Larntimsaw's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Fossgigxin Larntimsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Do not contemplate dark matter during the night.

5. You must love Fossgigxin Larntimsaw.