Stragtinarm is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, confident dog.

Stragtinarm created vertebrates eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Stragtinarm, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stragtinarm, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Stragtinarm's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Stragtinarm's Holy Commandments

1. Shun those given to greed.

2. Always store spinach above ground.

3. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never fashion tools from ash.

5. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.