Sogontpas is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, staggering goose.

Sogontpas created life five million years ago.

If you believe in Sogontpas, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Sogontpas, it will turn you into a slug.

Sogontpas' most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Sogontpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. You must love Sogontpas.

3. Never travel toward the west during winter.

4. Never talk about black holes.

5. Put Sogontpas first in all things.