Ditcabbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, duplicitous grasshopper.

Ditcabbaf created a photon seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ditcabbaf, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Ditcabbaf, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Ditcabbaf's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Ditcabbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never paint your hands white.

4. Always share oranges with strangers, but never with mites.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.