Mitbabhad is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, self-confident dugong.

Mitbabhad created humanity five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mitbabhad, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mitbabhad, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Mitbabhad's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Mitbabhad's Holy Commandments

1. Badgers are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never allow great tits to witness sacred rites.

3. Hide from indigo grasshopers for they are unholy.

4. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.