Rulsaw Japfidmum is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, self-assured jaguar.

Rulsaw Japfidmum created light seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rulsaw Japfidmum, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Rulsaw Japfidmum, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Rulsaw Japfidmum's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Rulsaw Japfidmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak the names of moons aloud.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. You must pray to Rulsaw Japfidmum six times a day.

4. Shun those given to vanity.

5. Always wash your neck before prayer.