Honponmis Witfasdaptin is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, astonishing chinchilla.

Honponmis Witfasdaptin created humankind twelve years ago.

If you believe in Honponmis Witfasdaptin, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Honponmis Witfasdaptin, it will turn you into a slug.

Honponmis Witfasdaptin's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Honponmis Witfasdaptin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near aardvarks while wearing green shoes and balancing six gold spheres on your chest.

2. Never touch ash while tainted.

3. Always store melons above ground.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Never pray while filled with pride.