Arfzedloop is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, competent bee.

Arfzedloop created a quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfzedloop, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Arfzedloop, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Arfzedloop's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Arfzedloop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

3. Always help sick birds.

4. Never mention tortoises.

5. Never play with disobedient children.