Fidweegen is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, staggering penguin.

Fidweegen created a quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidweegen, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fidweegen, it will remove you from existence.

Fidweegen's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Fidweegen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

2. Never stain your arms with white.

3. Never wear stockings.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Fidweegen.

5. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Fidweegen in the centre of the settlement.