Flabsawceb is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, selfish wyrm.

Flabsawceb created Asia two million years ago.

If you believe in Flabsawceb, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flabsawceb, she will boil you in a big pot.

Flabsawceb's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Flabsawceb's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Flabsawceb.

2. Never discuss ribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

3. Never travel toward the east during autumn.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not kill rats.