Loprenominfebgedsisarplag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, contented whale.

Loprenominfebgedsisarplag created a strange quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Loprenominfebgedsisarplag, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Loprenominfebgedsisarplag, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Loprenominfebgedsisarplag's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Loprenominfebgedsisarplag's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in the presence of nematodes.

2. You must pray to Loprenominfebgedsisarplag nine times a day.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Loprenominfebgedsisarplag.

4. Do not place lemons upon stone.

5. Do not listen to music.