Vildapcamcim is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, prudent dugong.

Vildapcamcim created gold two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vildapcamcim, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Vildapcamcim, he will strike you with lightening.

Vildapcamcim's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Vildapcamcim's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

3. Do not resist fate.

4. Pray towards the west.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.