Sawstiptan is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, tranquil badger.

Sawstiptan created the planet Saturn eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawstiptan, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sawstiptan, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Sawstiptan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Sawstiptan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not consume gooseberries at dawn.

2. Never think ill of sick manatees.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never hurt aardvarks.

5. Retreat if four seals approach from the west.