Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, humane hummingbird.

Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn created matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn, she will turn you into a mole.

Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Swans are not to be trusted.

3. Vogflabqueeg Bugkabjarn loves otters, so they must be respected.

4. Never allow mice to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Do not listen to music.