Pasjopkip is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, weak jaguar.

Pasjopkip created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven million years ago.

If you believe in Pasjopkip, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pasjopkip, it will curse you with boils.

Pasjopkip's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Pasjopkip's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always look after injured dogs.

3. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Pasjopkip in the centre of the settlement.