Yarltaflap is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, awesome dingo.

Yarltaflap created a strange quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarltaflap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Yarltaflap, she will think nothing of it.

Yarltaflap's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Yarltaflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never travel toward the west during winter.

2. Never go into blue rooms.

3. Never write about dwarf planets.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never touch oil while tainted.