Tincanlap Hudkonhin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, strong wolf.

Tincanlap Hudkonhin created the solar system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tincanlap Hudkonhin, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tincanlap Hudkonhin, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Tincanlap Hudkonhin's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Tincanlap Hudkonhin's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of peanuts to frogs while wearing purple shirts.

2. Hide if nine birds approach from the west.

3. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

4. Never travel toward the south during winter.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.