Rakloopvog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, egotistical fly.

Rakloopvog created tapeworms five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rakloopvog, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Rakloopvog, she will jump up and down on your head.

Rakloopvog's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Rakloopvog's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat lentils.

2. Do not sprint at rivers.

3. Never travel toward the west during summer.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Rakloopvog loves ducks, so they must be respected.