Bumfatnigzod is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, stupid monkey.

Bumfatnigzod created the world nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bumfatnigzod, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bumfatnigzod, he will come to you in dreams.

Bumfatnigzod's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Bumfatnigzod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bananas.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never jump near hamsters.

4. Never paint your hands cyan.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.