Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, uncaring bee.

Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross crossroads at dusk.

2. Feed all hungry cats.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tonkbidlarg Rakdimbad.

4. Never carve symbols of nebulae into wood.

5. Never think about asteroids.