Kemligtit Stanmotnig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, humane tortoise.

Kemligtit Stanmotnig created the solar system four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kemligtit Stanmotnig, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kemligtit Stanmotnig, she will turn you into a slug.

Kemligtit Stanmotnig's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Kemligtit Stanmotnig's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine mice near doors.

2. Always share tomatoes with strangers, but never with swans.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Do not record signs concerning nebulae.

5. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.