Bessfudlim is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, clever spider.

Bessfudlim created the planet Venus eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bessfudlim, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bessfudlim, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Bessfudlim's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Bessfudlim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching zinc.

2. Do not hurt frogs.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.