Rutcibpin Xem is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, ill-tempered centaur.

Rutcibpin Xem created the planet Earth seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutcibpin Xem, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Rutcibpin Xem, he will turn you into a dog.

Rutcibpin Xem's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Rutcibpin Xem's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always look after injured snails.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics.