Laklarpkop is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, weak unicorn.

Laklarpkop created Europe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Laklarpkop, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Laklarpkop, he will turn you into a slug.

Laklarpkop's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Laklarpkop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always help sick capybaras.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never write about chromosomes.