Hadmapkan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, self-assured centaur.

Hadmapkan created water four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadmapkan, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hadmapkan, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Hadmapkan's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Hadmapkan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

2. Never chant in holy places.

3. Never remain standing at dusk.

4. Never write about planets.

5. Do not dye your hair pink.