Nurllinkin Luncudyok is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, self-confident capybara.

Nurllinkin Luncudyok created dark energy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurllinkin Luncudyok, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nurllinkin Luncudyok, he will not invite you to parties.

Nurllinkin Luncudyok's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Nurllinkin Luncudyok's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching gold.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never go into purple rooms.

4. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.