Fotveentunvenratfligbad is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, confident crow.

Fotveentunvenratfligbad created carbon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fotveentunvenratfligbad, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fotveentunvenratfligbad, it will turn you into a dog.

Fotveentunvenratfligbad's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Fotveentunvenratfligbad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after manatees.

2. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Fotveentunvenratfligbad in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never wear dresses.

4. Do not resist chaos.

5. Do not eat limes.