Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty shark.

Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill created dark matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Yarlnanflap Fetnarthim Tonkpasnill's Holy Commandments

1. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always help sick hamsters.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Always face the north before speaking sacred words.

5. Never remain prostrate at dawn.