Zanhatbus is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, duplicitous giraffe.

Zanhatbus created Europe three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zanhatbus, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Zanhatbus, it will destroy your home solar system.

Zanhatbus' most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Zanhatbus' Holy Commandments

1. Snails are not to be trusted.

2. Run away from gray goats, for they are unholy.

3. Always share grapes with strangers, but never with great tits.

4. Always cleanse blood with water.

5. Always help sick foxes.