Bigspaglarn is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, pitiless warg.

Bigspaglarn created the Cigar Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bigspaglarn, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bigspaglarn, she will turn you into a sheep.

Bigspaglarn's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Bigspaglarn's Holy Commandments

1. Bigspaglarn loves swans, so they must be respected.

2. Do not speak of dark energy near sacred fires.

3. Never stain your back with orange.

4. Never feed apples to aardvarks while wearing violet ear rings.

5. Never hurt hamsters.