Taltofsug is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, irritating otter.

Taltofsug created gold five million years ago.

If you believe in Taltofsug, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Taltofsug, he will not invite you to parties.

Taltofsug's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Taltofsug's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near ants while wearing yellow trousers and balancing seven lead spheres on your hands.

3. Always wear green.

4. Taltofsug must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.