Negmilhud is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, blissful guinea pig.

Negmilhud created the planet Earth three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Negmilhud, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Negmilhud, she will not care.

Negmilhud's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Negmilhud's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan shirts on sacred days.

2. Never adorn your chest with yellow markings.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Never prepare coconuts during autumn.

5. Learn nine new languages a year.