Wodbissxuc is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, self-assured clam.

Wodbissxuc created the world seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wodbissxuc, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Wodbissxuc, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Wodbissxuc's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Wodbissxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Never fashion tools from wood.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never think about galaxies.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Do not shave your legs.