Latgebflab is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, staggering crab.

Latgebflab created carbon four million years ago.

If you believe in Latgebflab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Latgebflab, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Latgebflab's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Latgebflab's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

3. Hide from yellow bats for they are unholy.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Never adorn your face with green markings.