Volbemstanbid is a god.

He takes the form of a small, unthoughtful fox.

Volbemstanbid created energy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Volbemstanbid, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Volbemstanbid, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Volbemstanbid's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Volbemstanbid's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention ducks.

2. Never run in the presence of elders.

3. Never stain your legs with indigo.

4. Do not hurt hamsters.

5. Never feed rice to seals while wearing ear rings.