Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, sage pig.

Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem created the Sol system six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Kabdavlig Pasqueegvagbotnurlsitjinfem's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention ducks.

2. Never gather six turtles in one place.

3. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

4. Never approach forests carrying ash.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.