Rakweegil is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, fussy grasshopper.

Rakweegil created a down quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rakweegil, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Rakweegil, he will think nothing of it.

Rakweegil's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Rakweegil's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never stain your back with yellow.

3. Always help mites in need.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always pray immersed in water.