Bamsakquaf is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, clever wyrm.

Bamsakquaf created parasitic wasps three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bamsakquaf, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bamsakquaf, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bamsakquaf's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Bamsakquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

4. You must never eat lemons.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.