Dibjenfeb is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, merciless ant.

Dibjenfeb created a bottom quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dibjenfeb, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dibjenfeb, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Dibjenfeb's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Dibjenfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after otters.

2. Never talk about ultrasonics near pigs while wearing indigo kilts.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Heed all signs.